I'm not a good gift giver. Never have been. Seems I never will be. One of our daughters-in-law says my language of love is food because I always make sure the kitchen is full of everyone's favorite foods when they come visit. But gift giving? No matter how full of love my heart is I never can seem to pick out the right gift - or it's the right thing that goes horribly wrong...
Granpa is on call for the next four days - including Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. If he's in the middle of watching a movie on TV when he is called out, it's just tough luck. So I thought it would be a perfect gift to get him a TiVo so he could record the rest of whatever he was watching. I called TiVo and explained our "traveling" and that most places had cable TV (as opposed to satellite or old-fashioned off-the-airway TV). The technician said not only would this work in our different housings but we could even hook it up in hotel rooms. Cool! They had a unit that records up to 45 hours (that would be over 20 movies or 40 hour-long programs!) for just $59. I'll take it!
Then I get an email suggesting I go ahead and call the cable provider for a cable card that will insert into the back of the TiVo unit. ??? Ooo-kaaay... I discover that we have to take the old cable converter box back to the cable company and swap it out for the card. Hmmm. That means we'll be without TV until we can get the TiVo hooked up. I enlist a friend in this Santa project, and he helps me work out the logistics.
Granpa's on call and therefore late getting off because, as usual, they have a Stat Echo right at getting-off time. But I am SO excited when I pick him up from work! I tell him on the way home that he's gonna get an early Christmas gift and as soon as we get home he has to, without fussing, sit down and open it. He can't turn the TV on or go to the bathroom or even get a drink of water ('cause I didn't want him to notice the TV wasn't on or try to turn it on) - and remember, NO FUSSING.
So he dutifully complies and seems very pleased with the TiVo idea. I knew he would want to wire it to the TV himself (guys are like that), so he gets busy with that while I get supper on the table. He's running through the on-screen set up and gets to the spot where it says connect to the internet. I'm like, huh? Well, we have a wireless hot-spot, will that work? No. It says to connect to the land-line phone. Nope, don't have a phone line.
I knew it! I knew it! I simply canNOT give gifts. Aargh!
We call the 800 number. Gotta have the phone line or high-speed internet connection to get the programing. Can we watch TV tonight thru the TiVo cable card? Nope. Can't even get out of the set-up until we connect to
something.
So that's it. We have to undo everything I spent the whole day doing - tomorrow, because the cable company is closed for the evening -
AND we can't even watch
anything on TV tonight. My gifts aren't just bad, they somehow manage to devolve into TERRIBLE.
Bless Granpa's heart. He is
SO nice to me! He's sweet and loving the rest of the evening, even laughing at my misery in a warm gentle way. I suggest he do some on-line research to see if he can accomplish my gift idea through some other technology. (At least that will give him something to do since he can't watch TV...), and he discovers that there is nothing that a traveler can easily do to record TV without a lot of help from the landlords (i.e. getting a cable card and a land-line or internet hookup). Maybe we should go back to the the ol' VCR tape recorder??
This even messes up the popcorn popper I got him... I'm just NOT a good gift giver. From now on it's gonna be strictly
cash!